The first time I heard the phrase “Hot Dog Flavored Water” was from the name of a Limp Bizkit album back in 2000.¬† Apparently (or so had been told when the album came out) the band had a little inside joke about the whole thing.¬†¬†They were in a convenience store laughing¬†about all the different flavored waters that were flooding the market and said before you know it it’ll be flavored like hot dogs.
Well look no more my little broken up band…
From their site (www.dinnerinabottle.com): “An authentic taste of the Big Apple you can sip through a straw! Ever wondered how those street cart vendors go when they have to go? With all that dirty water just sitting right there? Now try to enjoy this liquidy libation! Hot Dog!”
But thats not it folks…they have just released their 50th flavor!¬† I won’t list them all (you can check the site if you really want to know - but I promise…some of the flavor descriptions are worth the wasted 15 minutes) but I will list a few of my favs: Mountain Oysters (yes bull testicles), Currywurst, Haggis, Sushi, Shrimp Pad Thai and of course Beef Jerky.
And here are a few of their claims:
“You will see an increase in size and a decrease in body fat, improved recovery abilities, and an increase in strength.”
“By drinking Meatwater you can cut down on exercising and eating time, and have more time to enjoy yourself.”
“MeatWater provides the essence of nutrition and the memory of dining without the hassle of eating. Professionals need ruthless efficiency to thrive in today’s busy marketplace. People don’t have time to google, walk their dogs, or stop their workflow simply to take in a meal. Successful people today are demanding the next generation of efficiency and luxury, and our innovative lifetool provides that for such an elite consumer.”
“We believe in choice. As food scientists, we have learned that at a quantum level it becomes increasingly difficult to differentiate between liquid and solid. Therefor, we believe that each individual should be able to make that choice for themselves, based on their own identity, and without interference.”
“Many people choose to mix MeatWater with vodka, again a lifestyle choice. This allows people to combine dinner and drinks, providing an even higher level of efficiency for today’s busy athlecutive.”
And now to top it all off is of course a commercial.¬† You won’t believe it.
And for some reason its still a mystery as to why the world is getting fatter…
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